In the process of clearing off my memory card for Halloween festivities tomorrow, I came across more Maui photos that provided a great source of escapism.
I also found a photo that Dylan took of me which captures a moment I enjoyed immensely: napping on the warm rocks as the sun set at Kalama Park.
I’ve noticed in this last batch of photos from a lovely dinner with friends that I cut off far too many heads when taking photos of people. I should fix that. I just love faces too much, methinks. Good thing I caught this before heading to Albuquerque this weekend. I’d hate to ruin a weekend of drunk reunion shots and (crossing fingers and toes) baby shots before realizing I am an untalented hack that spent way too much money on a fancy camera. And a new 50mm prime lens that should be arriving Wednesday.
Update on best friend baby stuff (see: things I am documenting for myself in which no one else cares ): currently 70% effaced and 1.5 cm dilated. Hold on until Friday lil dude(tte) – I want to get the last preggo shot of your Mamacita.
I anticipate this weekend, in between lounging around in my fancy hotel room, I should be meeting new faces (Hi Ro!), catching up with old ones, maybe holding a new baby, and trying to not get my rental car broken in to. Wish me luck!
I was chosen as photo of the day again by Seattlest. Either the pool slowed down or that Nikon d80 I borrowed to take the photo has some magic voodoo powers.
*rolls dice*
The d80 walks away victoriously.
One of my photos in the Seattlest flickr pool was chosen as photo of the day. Whee! They didn’t even do me dirty like the Bostonist did to my friend Kevin. That sure is nice of them. Now how’s that for a leisurely Saturday wank fest?
I was going through some of my Paris archives and this shot in particular took me back in an instant: the feeling of disgust as I picked out pieces of ham from my crepe while faintly hearing the sounds of children in a schoolyard playing. I remember the irrational fear that the pigeons swarmed en masse around me, fighting for the pieces of meat at my feet, were about to gauge my eyes out. I can still feel the greasy fat slime on my fingers, on the brink of tears because I was so overwhelmed with shame that my French sucked so bad that the cook thought my champignon was jambon, but distracted enough to be delighted by the sounds of kids yelling at each other in such a beautiful language. Thankfully, I eventually decided it was fucking ridiculous to be sitting in a lovely park near Rue Mouffetard feeling sorry for myself.
For those of you who aren’t a total hippie, you might find yourself pitching a tent over the meaty crepe. I’m sure it would’ve been amazing, as it still blew my mind despite the destruction I dealt it.
Two months later I finally added some holga shots from my trip to flickr to beef up my France set. I’ve sat there looking at the contact sheets for many weeks feeling unimpressed and disappointed. Unfortunately for me, while in Paris I was struck with “fear-of-taking-photo-itis”. You know, that illness that makes you so worried about being lumped into a lame group of people that I rarely took out the camera(s). Maybe this disease only runs rampant in Paris, where the outward disdain for tourists manifests in evil looks, insults being hurled, and elbows being thrown on the Metro. Or maybe it’s not that. I suppose a major concern was that the overwhelming beauty and awe I felt as I walked along small, winding, charming streets was never going to translate onto film. In hindsight I should have faced my fear of being seen as a tourist and shoved my fist in its face like any feisty Parisian. Instead I’m left with rolls of photos that I’m unimpressed by and a sinking feeling that I failed myself.
But before I slice my wrists, I have a roll of black and white 35mm developed and two more color rolls to go before I can get into full self-deprecating, navel gazing mode. Maybe I’ll post those shots somewhere. Maybe I won’t.
Some of you know I have a non-reciprocating love affair with photography. Non-reciprocating because it will never love me back with the same fervor, but I am unrelenting.
I take photos as a personal mental exercise. I admit I’m a navel gazer. I am much more comfortable enveloping myself in nostalgia and memories than living in the present. And forcing yourself to take notice of what is going on by use of a camera is a lovely way of enjoying and seeing the fruition of your moment-by-moment. In addition to this navel gazing, I’m also a bit down-trodden. I like to think of myself as Eeyore-esque – lovable, but sometimes hard to please. So seeing all these awesome, happy things that I shot always puts me in a better place.
So why all this pontification on photography? One of my favorite things to do is to peruse the fine photography on JPG Magazine’s site. To see ‘amateur’ photographers post such moving pieces always makes me try a little harder. Unfortunately my favorite past-time feels a little icky as there seems as though a bit of drama going down between the CEO and founders of the magazine. While I normally could give two shits about business drama, I feel let down by the seemingly draconian overtaking of the company.
So I deleted my account.
Now I’ll be back to scouring flickr trying to find the gems of visual candy. It’s daunting and not always satisfying, but it will have to do.
2007 Pictorial Spread
As the year winds to a close, I’ve become more reflective. No, this isn’t unique. Yes, it is important. Here is to you 2007, with all your awesome highs and shitty lows.
January:
keywords: love, happiness
February:
keywords: excitement, curiosity, preparation
March:
keywords: exaltation, travel, solitude, resistance
April:
keywords: longing, complacency
May:
keywords: loneliness, family, stagnancy
June:
keywords: friendship, forever, pain, heartache
July:
keywords: aging, calm, sadness
August:
keywords: friendship, tenderness, birth
September:
keywords: longing, music, melancholy
October:
keywords: change, upheaval, paranoia
November:
keywords: contemplative, scholarly, cold, dreaming
December:
keywords: apprehension, fear, excitement
And there you have it, ladies and gents. I don’t know about you all, but I’m ready to put this beast to bed.